Sunday, February 13, 2011

Thinking Out Loud (Reposted)


(I wrote this last year as an advice to my then, broken hearted daughter in an attempt to give her a piece of my mind…that there is more to a man than just his looks or popularity.  I am now sharing this to everyone as we celebrate Valentine’s Day. A reminder to those in love as well as to those who are still in search for one.)

"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU... The one who turns to his friends and says, “that’s her..."

I came across this quote amongst the hundreds that were posted and this made me pause and assess if this makes sense or not. 

I don't usually write about my thoughts but this, I consider to be something that is with great urgency and needs to be shared and pondered upon.

When we were little girls, we used to love fairy tales, always dreaming of finding our prince charming and live happily ever after. We would picture our true love to be the most handsome, dashing, sweet and brave knight that would sweep us off our feet. We actually believed that the cute guy-next-door character in romantic novels would make us the happiest. But lo and behold, this is not true all the time.

At my age, (I'm 37 by the way), I have proven this to be fictitious and absurd. It doesn't follow that if one is harmless-looking, charming and smart, he can make his woman happy. Looks can really be deceiving. And the ugly truth about it is a lot of women are still into this unrealistic vision of what they want their partners to be.

"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot..."Being "hot" fades in no time, faster for those who can't afford botox and lipo. Being beautiful is timeless because he sees through you and not just your temporary physical attributes.

"Find a guy...who calls you back when you hang up on him..." A guy calling back shows not only patience but also has the ability to sense that she only demands importance and wants her point to be heard.

"Find a guy...who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep..." This may be cheesy, especially to the teenagers nowadays, but they fail to see how a man can spend a lot of minutes or even hours of being inactive, without expecting any responsive gains, for as long as he is beside his love.

"wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on." This is not entirely for the sake of showing you off as a trophy. PDA (Public Display of Affection) could sometimes be an avenue for the man who could not contain his passion for his princess. And whoever said that kissing a forehead is only for gramps and grannies? This is one gesture that shows great respect, sincerity and purity of his intentions. I definitely wouldn't mind it at all. 

"One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU...The one who turns to his friends and says, that’s her...""He should not be scared to profess of his undying love and devotion through words. Men have always felt lame if they are vocal with how they feel, but if your guy does not hesitate to say it, give him full credit because he deserves it! He is definitely more of a man than the others who act otherwise.

Many would think this note may be full of nonsense but is it? I certainly beg to differ. Women are often blinded by a man's physique that sometimes the more important considerations are neglected. I don't have the reverie to wake women up and face the reality, however, I would like them to weigh options and see where they could be happier. 


 As for me, I found THE ONE and I am thankful that he showed up in this lifetime.


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